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Hospice of Visiting Nurse Service (Hospice & Palliative Care)

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• How to Help Someone Who is Grieving

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What Not To Do:

• Do not say, “I know how you feel.”
• Do not give false reassurances.
• Do not try to give quick, easy answers.
• Do not overreact to his/her anger.
•  Do not use false pampering.

What To Do:

• Give them permission to grieve.
• Allow the person to explore the suffering (loss) and the emotions associated with it.
• Let them know what feelings, ideas, thoughts or experiences you hear them expressing.
• Be patient. Let them go at their own pace. Be careful about rushing them because you are uncomfortable with their pain.
• Give them plenty of uninterrupted time.
• Find out what the loss means to the person. Don’t assume you know.
• Provide a safe arena for the airing of doubts.
• Explore their fears.
• When they are ready help them consider their goals, values and purpose for living.
• Remember to recognize their strengths, abilities and successes. Everything in balance.
• Encourage measured steps of activity.